A Moment of Truth Moment

I haven't been on here in a couple of days because I've been cleaning up a lot of vomit, which sounds a lot more interesting than it actually is. When I went to that damn school meeting the other night, I had to leave my youngest with the other toddlers and she got a door prize - vomiting and diarrhea 2 days later. That was most uncool.
This morning I think I might have gotten my first prostate exam, but this is not necessarily anything to congratulate me for because I have a vadge. Today was my annual exam and I usually don't even pay attention to what is going on because I've had two c-sections so at this point, you can't really shock me with anything gyn-related. So I had this really nice, long chat with my doctor - who I adore, by the way - and then at the end of the exam, he says, "I have to do a rectal exam". But the thing is, he said this AS HE WAS DOING THE RECTAL EXAM.
Um.
I told my friend Mark about this and he said, "Well, at least you were at the doctor's office?". And I suppose that's true. I'm not really sure if I was violated or not. I certainly felt violated, it was hard to continue our banter about fitness, etc. after that. The thing is, like I told my husband, I really like my gynecologist and he birthed my 2 children flawlessly, so if I brought some joy to his day then so be it. I do hope this plot gets turned into a Lifetime Moment of Truth movie though. So scandalous.
The bad news is, and you might want to quit reading now because this is just really highly inappropriate, before I left the house to go to my appointment, I had the most horrendous poo! I mean to the point where I considered taking a shower? Like really gross, but I was running a little late and just said to myself, (and this is where intuition kicks in and I should have listened to myself) "Eh, screw it, he's not gonna be looking at my ass". So I just wiped really, really thoroughly and left.
I guess the doctor got a door prize of his own.