Yo

Eff me, I haven't been keeping up with this like I swore I was going to. I've been really obsessed the last few days with dress shopping. I have to go to the mother of all shithot weddings next month in Hotlanta, and I've been trying desperately to find the perfect dress. I found the most perfect dress in the universe. Of course nothing in my life is ever simple, so I found it at gucci.com and that shit costs 5 grand. So epic fail there.
And that led me to thinking about Britney Jean Spears. That heifer can afford my dream dress. She can afford Gucci's entire fall line. And yet, everytime we see her ass she is rocking the Wet Seal clearance rack tube tops and shit. It's not right. I try to live my life by the credo "When you know better, you do better". It chaps my ass when everyone else in the world doesn't do the same thing.
I wish I gave a shit about these people on Melrose Place. I wish I knew their names. You know, I'm actually glad that I had my formative years during the grunge era, because this shit these 20-somethings wear today is ridonkulous. Hookerchic. It reminds me of that Eddie Murphy routine he did about his grandma "These girrrls be walkin' round, wearin the short skirts, smoking the cocaine, baby what time is it, it's so collld in here". During the grunge era, here was my cute outfit: band t-shirt, flannel shirt, very holey jeans, Birkenstocks. Hair long and parted down the middle. Survey says: fucking embarrassing. But seriously, so much less pressure than having to walk around like hooch of the week.
OMG So my sister asked me last week about the Kardashians, and I didn't even really have an opinion? Well, it came on the other day while I was putting laundry away and holy shit, that is precisely, exactly what is wrong with the state of women in this country today. I blame those skanks for EVERYTHING, ok? All of it. It takes a lot to disgust me, trust that, so for me to call the Kardashians out for being NAST says a lot. Here is a synopsis if you have never seen the show: 3 girls have very low self-esteem and sexual issues out the ying, and have a combined IQ of 34, and their stepdad looks like a Halloween costume. They don't like themselves very much. Kim Kardashian stands around professing to be a size 2 and her sisters are drunk and/or pregnant. OFFENSIVE.
I had a really great ending for this, but then I got caught up in Melrose Place, ugh, so that ending has now shit the bed. Peace out, bitches.